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Something Long Overdue: Losing A Friend

I've been wanting to write this post for some time (since early 2015 to be exact); the reason that it's taken me so long is that I simply couldn't put into words the loss that I felt, and that I still feel to this day. There is no way of sugar coating such a topic of conversation, because no matter how a person's life is taken, it doesn't make dealing with the grief any easier. Initially the purpose of this post was to offer some form of advice, however I have come to realise that in circumstances such as these, there are no number of tips, or wise words that can help. I know that everybody deals with things in different ways, thus the purpose of this post is to offer myself as somebody to talk to- a metaphorical hand to hold.

This time last week, I was surrounded by the friends and loved ones of someone special, gathered together to celebrate her 21st Birthday. This is not the way that I ever imagined spending her entrance to adulthood; we should be out, partying, stumbling home at the early hours of the morning linking arms and helping one another crawl through the front door.. but alas, this is not the case. This young girl was much more than a friend; she was outgoing, encouraging, and so full of life. Despite our paths taking us in different directions, whenever they crossed we could talk as though not a day had gone by, and in my opinion friends like those are few and far between; although she may not be here anymore, I continue to cherish the memories that we shared, and hope that she is doing something that she loves, wherever she may be. Aged 20 I would have never expected to be writing about such a dear friend in past tense; she had her whole life ahead of her, and I have no doubt that she would have done great things. Experiencing such a loss has changed my outlook on life; I try to seize every opportunity in a way that I know she would, squeezing every last drop of 'good' out of it until moving on to the next exciting thing! I would by no means call myself a religious person, but I like to think of it as having a guardian angel, forcing me to make the most of life and pushing myself to achieve greatness.

Now I'm no expert, but I can only imagine that losing somebody is one of the greatest pains that a human can feel. There is no way to shake the feeling. No matter how hard you try, it will creep up on you when you least expect it; a picture, a song, even a moment and you will be reminded. Losing anybody is incredibly difficult, and we all deal with things differently; I may not be able to advise you, but I can tell you first hand that grief can come in many shapes and forms, whether it's tears or laughter- you name it! My friend was taken so suddenly, nobody could have predicted such a tragedy, so we have nothing to do but hold onto the happy memories that we have.

As I said at the start of this post, I am unsure as to what I wanted to accomplish by writing this; but I knew that I wanted to write it regardless. Seeing my dear friends family members grow by the day, a new baby, a wedding, birthdays, I am constantly reminded of the life that was taken by no means of her own. Loss is such a powerful thing, and because of this I urge you to tell the people you love, that you love them. Over the years I have become much soppier and far more sentimental, sharing my feelings and making the most of every moment; sometimes I question this, but today I am grateful for such a trait.


  1. Sometimes I think the simple act of writing down your feelings can be not only cathartic but also help others who will read what you're saying and feel like they're not alone. I'm so sorry for your loss. Although I've not lost a close friend before, I'll always remember the shock of losing a work colleague - one day there, the next taken away. It really does put your life into perspective and make you realise that you need to sieze every opportunity and not wish the days away.

    Laura xx | Loved By Laura

    1. Thank you so much lovely; it's surprising how therapeutic writing down your feelings can be. Although I miss my friend dearly, thinking about the past and all of the experiences that we shared helps to keep me positive. I am so sorry for your loss; losing somebody is a difficult thing to deal with, regardless of the circumstances. XX


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