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11.2.23

Hello, 2023.


I wasn't sure whether or not I would return to this blog. After the first covid-19 lockdown I felt completely lost and as hard as it is to admit, I'm not sure I ever really found myself again (at least not the version of myself that I was before!) The past twenty four months have been a whirlwind to say the least- I took a brave step to end what was a very toxic relationship, moved house more times than I can count and found myself living back with my parents while I pieced things back together again. I find great joy in saying that I am feeling more "me" than I have felt in a very long time, so am now ready to see whether or not I am still capable of forming a semi-coherent sentence.

As we have said goodbye to the first month of 2023, I thought I would outline where I am now and where I want to be this time next year. It's been a while since I bothered setting myself 'New Years resolutions' finding that by March I'd already broken my rule of not doing something (or completely forgotten to do the things I set out to do) so there's really no point... I'm a creature of habit, what can I say?

Life Lately

Last year I found myself single for the first time in just short of eight years, and to say that it has been a wild ride would be an understatement. I've been on great dates, terrible dates, certainly now know what I do and don't want in partner, and can say with confidence that good things really do come to those who wait (pardon the cliché!) At this moment in time I am in a great place with a great person, who makes me feel on top of the world... after navigating life on my own for a little while it's refreshing to have somebody to share things with and make new and exciting plans for the future. Things are still new, but I'm a firm believer of when you know you know. 

Aside from realising just how true the phrase "patience is a virtue" is, another important lessons that I learned over the past year is that you shouldn't take anything for granted. Nothing is guaranteed. Happiness, health, sanity- you name it. Last summer I took a very silly fall and ended up with a broken navicular (which is a small but pretty significant bone in your foot, if you're as uneducated as I apparently am) which meant that I was unable to walk or drive for months; both my physical and mental health were impacted in one way or another and it's safe to say that it made me realise just how true the above statements are. I'm lucky that I am surrounded by such wonderful people and although I run the risk of sounding like one of the many "icks" that I came across on my short but much needed single spell, I truly wouldn't be where I am without my support network and thank them daily for keeping my feet planted firmly on the ground.

Reading this back I realise that I mentioned wanting to draw attention to my 'goals' for the next 12 months, but thinking about it there isn't anything that I am particularly concerned about (apart from giving my new house a coat of paint or two!) ... Of course I want to do well at work, to push myself and bring home as much money as I can to spend on the things that I love; I also want to explore as many places as I can with my partner and put a bit more effort into looking after myself; but really if in a years time I am able to reflect and say to myself "you worked hard, believed in yourself and it worked" I will be more than happy with that.

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